Children start training for comedy at a very early age. Most kids are funny and they say funny things. That is one of the greatest things about working with children. However, it is worth having a lesson early in the year because you will revisit this many times during the year. In fact, words are at the root of bullying. Often when we tell a child that something they said to another child was hurtful, they respond, “I was just kidding,” as if that absolves them of their responsibility for being kind. If what they said caused half the class to laugh, it is even more rewarding for the comedian and even more hurtful for the victim. The victim of the hurtful words often feels helpless to stop it and it is frequently how mean nicknames gain traction. 

When I teach children about the power of words, they will often contribute the old proverb, “sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me.” We all grew up hearing that but it is very wrong. I teach them that “sticks and stones will break my bones but words will break my heart.”  And if we are not careful, it can shatter our dreams, make us believe we are less than, and burn an image on our psyche that can’t be erased. I’ll bet if you think back to your own school days, you can recall a name somebody called you or an experience with someone  that created a lasting memory of being emotionally pained. If it wasn’t, you wouldn’t still remember it.

Children are actually rewarded for being funny. They love to laugh and make everyone else laugh. The problem is that the goal is laughter and they breeze right past all of the warning signs that there will be one person who won’t genuinely find it funny. It takes lots of lessons (and apologies) to get to this point, but it is as important a part of what we are teaching as multiplication. I remind children who might laugh at the comedian that their character is being revealed by what they find funny. Cutting off the laughter from the audience will often quell the enthusiastic comedian. 

If you have a particularly difficult comedian in your class, you may have to teach “ if you can’t be kind, you can at least be quiet.”

The saying that was on the wall  in every  one of my classrooms was …” Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words can really hurt me.” We talked about what this means over and over. Clearly I have very little tolerance for this inappropriate behavior. For many of our PEC students,  name calling and other inappropriate jokes may be part of their everyday home life. You  may need to incorporate  role playing and other creative lessons to get the point across. You can’t change a student’s home environment, but you can be clear about what your expectations are in the classroom.

Pamela Webster, M. Ed., SPED